Penis Poofer

Ok. So Rachel and I had the best fricking convo ever! Read this shit! You'll pee your pants laughing so hard!

Me: He ditched us!
Rach: How Dare He!!
Me: I know right?! Looks like no Casstara time today :( *Sobs*
Rach: -tear- Awe.
Me: Sad sad day. I really wanted you to meet him! Lol. Men...just a pain in the ass! LOL
Rach: Yaya, pain in the ass. -rubs ass and pouts-
Me: *Frowns* We should banish men from the earth...so much more would get done!
Rach: YESYESYES!
Me: Sweet! It's a plan...now how do we go about executing it?
Rach: -taps chin- We should make a penis poofer!
Me: A penis poofer? And what exactly would this contraption do? *Raises an eyebrow*
Rach: Makes all the penis' go POOF! -wiggels my fingers and waves my hands in a circle shape-
Me: *nods* Ahhhhh. I see...I see. And how will we make this amazing machine?
Rach: -shrugs- GIRL POWER!
Me: Ok. Well first we need supplies...I think a trip to the junkyard is in order?
Rach: -nods- Yeah. And my makeup box
Me: *hops in the car* You comin?
Rach: -jumps in beside you and rubs my hands together- Ooooooooo yeah..
Me: Alright bitch! Lets get to steppin! *Slams the gas and speeds to the junkyard. Gets out*
Rach: -gets out and grabs a rusty chainsaw with a devilish grin on my face- Puuuurfect.
Me: *Smirks and laughs evily* Muahhahaha. *Finds a dirty icepick and smirks* This'll be fun!
Rach: -nods and picks up an old vaccum cleaner- MUAHAHA
Me: OOoooooo. That'll be fun! *Runs around and finds a huge magnet* For those with piercings....*Smirks evily
Rach: -grins- Muahaha. Perfect. Lets get building.
Me: Lets get to it! *throws the stuff in the trunk and hops back in the car*
Rach: -jumps in rubbing my hands together- Muahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahaha
Me: *throws head back and laughs* MUAHAHAHAHAHHAHAMUAHAHHAMAUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
Rach:WATCH THE ROAD!
Me: OH! *looks back at the road and pulls up to the house* OOPS! *Gets out and grabs the supplies*
Rach: -gets out with an evil grin and shouts- BEWARE ALL YOU PENIS HOLDERS, BEWAREEEEEE!!!
Me: Muahahahahah! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! *Dumps the supplies on the floor and grabs a box of tools* Ready?
Rach: -nods and laughs as all the men run from their houses screaming like girls- READY!
Me: *Turns on the machine*
Rach: -laughs evilly as every man in the word screams in pain, penis' flying in all directions getting sucked into the machine-
Me: *Throws head back* MUahahahahah. MUahahahaha. MUAHAHAHAHAH. Rachel! We've done it! *watches the penis' fly*
Rach: -laughs hysterically- Muahahahaha. WOMAN RULE!
Me: WOMAN RULE THE WORLD NOW! MUAHAHAHAHAHAH FINALLY!

Ok. So I know we're a little ridiculous but I almost peed my pants I was laughing so hard!